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@genducation👩🏻⚕️| 𝓜.𝓓. 𝓟𝓱.𝓓. | 28 | ENFJ | author #DrippingMascara #WastedRoses | poet • artist • doctor • scientist | >6,000,000 reads📚 ALL links👇🏼
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#drippingmascara#wastedroses#episode#episodeinteractive#visualnovel#medicine#novel#episodechooseyourstory#noticemeepisode#episodechooseyourstoryapp
Recent posts
Today, Dripping Mascara is 1️⃣0️⃣ years old 🥹🎂🥳 Tell me below… what has changed for YOU in ten years, my friend?
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I’ll start 🤗 I finished medical school, then residency 🩺 I moved 3 different cities 🌃 I am doing the job I always dreamed of—treating mostly children with cancer as a #beamdoctor 👩🏻⚕️ and also with a lab 👩🏻🔬 to discover science in 🦠🧬🧫 I married my soulmate (it wasn’t an April Fools prank! 😜) but we remain long distance 😢 I am constantly stumbling but also learning about the world and myself every day 🙈 Now tell me… how are YOU?!
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In honor of 10 years, I’ll be announcing a 💰 cash prize 💵 giveaway + a live chat SOON, because we really are due for a session to catch up! 😩 I know I’ve been spotty 👉🏼👈🏼 Sorry, but I just didn’t want to bother you when I didn’t have as much to report by way of updates! And I love that I still feel close to you despite the time that’s passed.
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Can I take you back to Nov 11, 2014? I was newly 20, sitting on my aged sofa with my laptop, but it may as well have been my heart in my hands that night 🥺♥️ As I hit “publish”, I let my heart fly off into the world like a momma bird nudges her young 🐣 In a moment of vulnerability, I didn’t know what lay ahead—all I knew is that it was TIME to tell a story… my story.
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This then became the longest story on Episode, and quite possibly the most enduring Classic style story. 10 seasons, 132 chapters, with an Epy Award. I laughed, cried, broke, and healed as I wrote this story I so love to tell, and then did the same things all over again as I read all of your amazing reactions 😍 You were an unmatched audience—it’s been such an honor to enjoy your readership.
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This story grew life that I never anticipated even in my wildest dreams 🤧 We’ve marveled at hundreds of fan poems 📝 thousands of fan art 🎨 a few pieces of fan music 🎶 and a worldwide community 😳🌏 Some of you have called this story your favorite in all of the reading you’ve done 😱 What an honor that is. You christened yourselves Mascarettes 😭 You told me to make this saga into a real book in thousands of messages, and even a movie in hundreds of messages 🤯
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CONTINUED👇🏼
1,080 likes · 142 comments · 11 Nov 2024
Beginning this journey, I felt already stifling walls closing in on me. I nurtured a gnawing dread that I would never find in real life the kind of love I wrote about.
Over years, there was discouragement—looking up at a mountain that had no guardrails, no maps, and felt charted with landmines and dead-ends and pointless bland scenery.
In online swipes, instead of feeling empowered, I felt vulnerable and violated.
I dreamed that I would find something organic. Pure. Comforting. Homegrown.
This instead felt wild, unsavory at times, random, and formulaic.
Now, randomness in real life could be very special—a “soulmate” supposition from the conjecture that a connection was “meant to be”.
Randomness online was haphazard, yet totally intentional—removing any intrigue of stars aligning by chance, and instead presenting an aromantic, judgmental, and impersonal calculus. It felt like a chore.
So explain why your charming missive instantly brought me intrigue + ease.
Imagine my vague familiarity reading your prose but ❓ why I felt that safety + trust.
Slow, spurting conversations later, after startling confessions and guarded lapses in conversation, after discussing chocolatier dreams + office bitches—and interrupted by a powerful poem with a transient epiphany—we finally met.
Eventually, your beautiful ♥️ + tender care revealed itself. To render a long story short, I felt the glimmer ✨ of love wake in my chest, and it made me emotional to harbor her. After all this time, finally—a break of hope.
I could love.
I was in love.
And your stunning love became undeniable.
Guarded hearts then melted when we wept under waterfalls. Dreams spoke their truth using our tongues and found each other in our newfound rejection of inertia. Passion brought us together through surprises, poetry, and gestures of rich affection that were grand and small but most of all, appreciated, never taken for granted, and above all—reciprocated.
I loved, but now I was loved in return.
I found a 🏠 in his ♥️ but he wanted to live in my ♥️ as well.
And now, darling.
You’re the end of my #drippingmascara.
Now I have the honor and gift of calling you my husband.
#justmarried #weddingvows
1,660 likes · 186 comments · 01 Apr 2024
not a lot going on at the moment…
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jk 🙈 it’s #eightyearsofdrippingmascara and I’m working on things… still! 😮💨 I’ve been writing a lot lately, actually! not quite ready to show yet 👀
but, outside of clinic — between life, lab, lazy days, and lately… love — I’ve been typing away 😌 thanks so much for your patience and support over the years. SO crazy lucky to call you friends and family as well as readers of my rambles ♥️
I miss you and all the fun we used to have! ‘till more updates soon 🥰 yours always
💋 Gen
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#drippingmascara #childrenofink #poetry #prose #poem #poems #words #love #quote #quotes #missing #life #heal #art #writersofinstagram #lovequotes #romance #poet #poets #writing #poetrycommunity #story #igpoets #instapoem
868 likes · 166 comments · 11 Nov 2022
My dear friends 💕 I re-emerge from this long hiatus on Shelley’s birthday 🥳 with a song that, as soon as I heard, knew would be the soundtrack to whatever this apology-explanation thing this post is about to be 🙈 🎼#thisismetrying by @taylorswift🎶
I didn’t expect to be making this post backed by a cover I recorded with my (new) guitar 🪕 But I suppose the many seasons that I have been disconnected from you all are expected to bring many changes with them 🥴 But that’s a conversation for future author notes & live chats 😘
Some of you have wondered if I’ve been offed by the pandemic we all faced with grit and sighs ⚰️ Others have wondered if I got hacked 💻 I am here now to say I am very much alive, am doing well, and in full possession of my online presence, thankfully.
I’ve just been super, SUPER busy 😅 As I say in this 📽 I’ve had to choose between extracurricular things I love to do (writing) and other things I love to do but also *have* to do. Professionally, it’s been very rewarding. Personally, I’ve felt more than a little guilty and sometimes a little incomplete. It’s been hard to multitask in the way I used to easily while early on in school. Work just demands a different kind of focus.
However, 2 weeks ago I began what we call a “research year” and my schedule is more flexible—so I’m rediscovering old loves… hobbies + you!
I swear there’s not a day that goes by that I haven’t thought of you all and how you’re doing. The mark you left in my🫀is so special, and I’m excited to revisit our writing journey with a goal to republish Dripping Mascara in Limelight this November in time for the next anniversary. It has not gone unnoticed by me that I didn’t post in the last anniversary nor on April 1. I guess, I had nothing to offer and avoided it.
“I didn’t know if you care if I came back; I have a lot of regrets about that” is a #swiftie lyric that felt like a stab when I first heard it, so authentic it is to how I feel about seemingly dropping off the face of the 🌎 the last few years. If I could clone myself to manage more pots on this always burning stove, I would. But there was just not enough gas—until now.
And gosh, it’s so good to be back 🥹
♥️ Gen
973 likes · 386 comments · 19 Jul 2022
This week, my soulbaby Dripping Mascara turned six years old. I’ve missed it, and I miss you! I’m so excited to announce that its rebirth will be as a @talesfiction story as their amazing team works closely with me. I also finally got THE Twitter handle via a US trademark!
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Reflecting on this anniversary, I feel pride, nostalgia, wonder… and shame because I haven’t been able to do more for it, and I haven’t been there for you guys the way you’ve been there for me. I wanted to come back here a few times—Shelley’s 🎂, the day the story finished in Sep, & then of course, Nov 11. But I didn’t have the words until now, and I got strangely overwhelmed when I thought about coming back with no updates to give.
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Fortunately, I have something to say thanks to @talesfiction. They have spurred me to confront why I’m paralyzed by the story’s start. I’m redevising it for this app and of course the real book. I’m excited for you to see it!
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I’ve reflected plenty on what this story means to me + how it changed my life. I reach for it again as I dust the cobwebs around my ♥️—finding that some wounds haven’t healed and that revising this story is my medicine 💊
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I’m so sorry I’ve been absent 🤧 I constantly think about you. But 2020 has been challenging on all of us—and I’ve chosen to handle my stress in private. Some worry that I have “grown out” of the story—I disagree, I’m just reenvisioning it! You’ll see new scenes, concepts, richer characters. Things are happening behind the scenes—despite the busy-ness of learning how to be the best cancer doctor I can be—the ways I’ve grown as a person reflect in the way I’m rewriting Shelley.
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I think back to when I was writing the story. I was younger & anxiety didn’t conquer my vision of the future like it does now. I’ll discuss in a livechat (Nov 28) how with age my 🥀-colored 👓 have cracked. I told my friend recently—I feel like a setting sun 🌅
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But I should remember even sunsets are beautiful, and after every sunset is a sunrise. In 2021, I’m excited to bring you Dripping Mascara like you’ve never seen it. Thank YOU for your patience, for following along, and for being beacons of purpose. Happy #sixyearsofdrippingmascara — I♥️U
1,156 likes · 222 comments · 15 Nov 2020
LIVE CHAT 💭 tentatively 📅 Sat May 2 or Sun May 3
☤
1️⃣ So I wrote a thing—better than anything else I could caption to tell you what’s going on. Swipe LEFT for the full poem ⏪
2️⃣ What a time to be in #NYC 🌃, and to be a #doctor in this epoch of history! Tbh if I wasn’t here, I’d have some #FOMO...
3️⃣ I’ve been safe so far!
4️⃣ I’ll reply to DMs/comments SOON, I promise 🙈
☤
nostalgia in the E.R. #NYCstrong
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Nostalgia is the countenance of a chest X-ray
unblemished by “bilateral hazy opacities”
to not have to sit with the fear of sending someone home
under guidelines designed to relieve a hospital’s creaking capacity
☤
Oh, the folly of a gilded time when I’d discard masks
just because they’d found their way to the floor
now priceless armor marking my face, which misses the nothingness
of air freely inhaled through a beak that’s lately been sore
☤
Sometimes, I reflect with stale heaviness on an era
where hugs and nebulizers were treatments dispensed without fear
in emergency rooms, the symphony of lives hinging beeps,
punctured by the hiss of oxygen to buffer a hunger so severe
☤
The epoch of cold, distanced #living spells a manner of undignified #dying
suffering deprived of the simple warmth of a loved one’s touch
a dubious, small mercy it was—now only regarded as a “mercy”
because its denial perversely protects the ones that #love them so much
☤
At hospital entry, nostalgia is remembering when the purpose of discussing
code status with patients was, more often than not, hypothetical
the promise of reassurance charts shaky ground that was once solid
doubts sprout this foreign land, disrupting the foundation of much that is medical
☤
Lately, the edge feels precariously near—I used to be surprised
when I discovered an unsuspecting fellow healer as being hypoxic
we confront the fragile certainty that is the transience of being
as we face a microscopic menace that seems bizarrely toxic
☤
GiveUsPPE, give us answers,
predict less contradicting futures
keep this spirit, all this kindness,
and thanks for staying home—you’re a trooper!
☤
SWIPE LEFT for the full #poem ♥️ Hope you‘re safe. Love you! #readpoetry
992 likes · 58 comments · 19 Apr 2020
Way back when, our friendship was born in جوش (pronounced jo-esh | definition: passion, anger).
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The girl was small. Feathery black hair was her only evident feature because she was reduced to a ball on the school bathroom floor, evading kicks and punches and tugs—but unable to shield herself from the verbal abuse being hurled at her.
My heart squeezed from the sight before me, but soon my blood froze from the sound of the teacher’s booming voice after her own shock evaporated.
“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!” she demanded.
All four of the miscreant teens sprang up like stiff wooden boards. I had the keen instinct that they wondered if, by being still and holding their breaths, they may somehow go undetected and overlooked. The poor girl on the floor broke her fetal position and rose to sit. I could see now that it was Miriam Ruscuiti...
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FULL SCENE in comments 👇🏼
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Jisha is the MC of this short story—remember her? 😃 The title is the Urdu word جوش (pronounced jo-esh) meaning “passion”, usually in the context of anger/enthusiasm. It’s a pun on the name Jisha. Another pun would be میری جوش (meri jjoshe) translating into “my passion”—“meri” would be a pun on Miri 😼
The title colors represent 🇮🇳 I will explore the cultural connection Jisha chases after her mother and depraved stepfather are killed (remember that?) We’ll revisit what losing her family, and loving her rejected older sister, means to Jisha.
This will be a life snapshot story 🔍 Parts will be about drama that wasn’t deeply delved into between these three characters, from Jisha’s POV. Jisha has a mad crush on Miriam’s older bro, Steve, which maddens Miriam to no end. She shuts conversations every time someone attempts to talk to her about her reactionary stance. I don’t know exactly where the story will go except to say currently the dynamic isn’t resolved and the story would help explore that.
There’s also how #Jeve was finally born, and we will see how they coped after... well, you know what happened in the last chapter 😢
All in all: a provocative, passionate story Im excited to tell 🙈 Thoughts?
April Fools! #onceuponafoolishday Though this actually *may* be something I will write later! 🥰
968 likes · 79 comments · 01 Apr 2020
On Nov 11, 2014, I was newly 20, sitting on my aged leather sofa with my laptop, but it may as well have been my heart in my hands that night 🥺♥️ As I hit “publish”, I let my heart fly off into the world like a momma bird nudges her young 🐣 In a moment of vulnerability, I didn’t know what lay ahead—all I knew is that it was TIME to tell a story… my story. It was a story that had many iterations, stops and starts, and abandoned prequels. But this time, I vowed to finish it.
✧
That was a time I was young, in love, and suffering from it 🥺 I was in the last year of my Ph.D., and had just been accepted to my dream medical school 🩺 And yet with all of these changes, I couldn’t make peace with a heartbreak that plagued me for 10 confusing years.
✧
In the 7 years before that, I had written a poem for him on his birthday every year—which I would never send 💌 But this “love” was dying a slow death, and I needed to close this chapter for good. The only way I could see that happening was if I wrote a story, symbolically closing that affair as I closed the book I planned to write 📚
✧
5 years later, I have written the longest story on Episode, and quite possibly the most enduring Classic style story. 10 seasons, 132 chapters, with an Epy Award, and my hire as a Directing Apprentice. I laughed, cried, broke, and healed as I wrote this story I so love to tell, and then did the same things all over again as I read all of your amazing reactions 😍 You were an unmatched audience—it’s been such an honor to enjoy your readership.
✧
This story grew life that I never anticipated even in my wildest dreams 🤧 We’ve marveled at hundreds of fan poems 📝 thousands of fan art 🎨 a few pieces of fan music 🎶 and a worldwide community 😳🌏 Some of you have called this story your favorite in all of the reading you’ve done 😱 What an honor that is. You christened yourselves Mascarettes 😭 You told me to make this saga into a real book in thousands of messages, and even a movie in hundreds of messages 🤯
✧
It’s time 🥰 Today, Dripping Mascara is five years old.
✧
CONTINUED IN COMMENTS 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼
1,351 likes · 278 comments · 11 Nov 2019
SO overdue, but I wanted to share this mindblowing art by Tianna @ep.tijana 😱😍✨ I’m so in love with the attention to detail, soft colors, delicate shape of the rose, and the expert wielding of light and shadows. It’s ravishing and just what I needed to say goodbye to this story 🥀 ‘Wasted Roses’ is finally complete, born a Pisces, and now finished in September. ‘Dripping Mascara’ was born a Scorpio, and... also completed in September 🔮 I might be sensing a theme 🙈
I finished ‘Dripping Mascara’ with the start of my clinical years in med school, and now I close ‘Wasted Roses’ with the start of residency. The finale for ‘Dripping Mascara’ was my 750th post; the finale for ‘Wasted Roses’ happens to be my 800th.
The stories couldn’t be more similar in some ways, but they also couldn’t be more different in others. ‘Wasted Roses’, while being a tragedy/romance/mystery/thriller, ends with hope and life. ‘Dripping Mascara’ ended with death, yes, but it ultimately concluded with new life.
I’ve received the conclusion of ‘Wasted Roses’ with uncertainty so different than the peculiar mix of grief and relief that came with ending ‘Dripping Mascara’. Because from here, I have to go back. But as I’ve thought about it more, I look forward to going back 😃 Because with ‘Wasted Roses’, I realized I missed writing stories with little siblings 👧🏻 and overbearing hopeful mother-in-laws 👩🏻 and sinister reapers 👺 and dramatic backstories 🤯 and old scrolls 📜 oh, and magic 🧚🏼♀️ — all things that were a bit lacking in ‘Wasted Roses’. This being said, ‘Wasted Roses’ will always be special, my less loved child. For one thing, it is set in rural country 🌾 that hearkens to my childhood and to an aesthetic I cherish 🛤
I’m so proud of both stories. They are both works of ART, not forgettable tales, both sagas I don’t see reproducing with the same passion in the foreseeable future. I poured my heart into these stories. I hope I can find that kind of inspiration again. Both have compelling contemporary issues woven into the words, characters, and plot. ‘Wasted Roses’ breaks frontiers on this app that no story has.
•
CONTINUED...
750 likes · 48 comments · 06 Oct 2019
F I N A L L Y, the ‘WASTED ROSES’ 🥀 finale is out NOW with 2️⃣ endings depending on your previous choices! Swipe RIGHT 🚩 for the trailer! 3️⃣ chapters await, packed with some of my best directing, shocking plot twists, and a touch of horror... just in time for that spooky, sinister October air 🎃☠️🦇
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I present to you CHAPTER 27: “Venomous Sap” ⚰️ | CHAPER 28: “Guns and Roses” 💣 | and CHAPTER 29: “Ashes of Roses” 🌫 | plus the EPILOGUE (happy ending) “Rosy Ever After” 🌹
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I am CRAVING your reaction 😛 and will have a long sappy thank you speech eventually. Writing this story has truly been a process, a labor of love, and bringing together multiple visions of something unprecedented to @episode. It’s taught me a lot and I hope this story stays with you as it will with me 😭
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Tag me in screenshots 💬 and 🚨PLEASE COMMENT🚨 YOUR REACTION BELOW✨ Eager to receive your feedback 🙈
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WINNER 🏆 of the 2016 Valentine’s Day Contest on @episode 🥀 now rebooted, LINK IN BIO 🎬 Play minigames in this story... saving lives and being a doctor! 🕹 CHOICES MATTER! 👻
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🎶”Look What You Made Me Do” by #taylorswift 🎼
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#wastedroses #episode #episodeinteractive #visualnovel #medicine #novel #episodechooseyourstory #noticemeepisode #episodechooseyourstoryapp #episodeapp #episodelife #mascarosette #mascarette #drippingmascara -
762 likes · 152 comments · 29 Sep 2019
CHAPTER 26 - “Burning Roses” 🔥🥀 is OUT NOW! This is the THIRD chapter this weekend... I’m on a roll! 💁🏻♀️
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There are only FOUR more chapters left before the story is finished... not sure when the next update will be because I’m graduating medical school next weekend, baby! 🤣Don’t hate me too much 😘
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Tag me in screenshots 💬 and 🚨PLEASE COMMENT🚨 YOUR REACTION BELOW✨ I am hungry for your feedback 🙈
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WINNER 🏆 of the 2016 Valentine’s Day Contest on @episode 🥀 now rebooted, LINK IN BIO 🎬 Play minigames in this story... saving lives and being a doctor! 🕹 CHOICES MATTER! 👻
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🎶”Never Grow Up” by #taylorswift 🎼
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#wastedroses #episode #episodeinteractive #visualnovel #medicine #novel #episodechooseyourstory #noticemeepisode #episodechooseyourstoryapp #episodeapp #episodelife #mascarosette #mascarette #drippingmascara
482 likes · 100 comments · 12 May 2019
🥀 CHAPTER 24 - “Fake Sugar Petals” and CHAPTER 25 - “Fading Rose” are both OUT NOW, optimal for night reading sure to keep you on your toes 💀 The signage you see in this trailer is all mine 😘 But outside of the directing, I ABSOLUTELY CANNOTTT wait to hear what you think about the crazy content of this chapter — 🚨PLEASE🚨take a second to leave a comment 💬 and tag me in screenshots!
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I plan to update with one more chapter tomorrow if you all deliver with comments 😌
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WINNER 🏆 of the 2016 Valentine’s Day Contest on @episode 🥀 now rebooted, LINK IN BIO 🎬 Play minigames in this story... saving lives and being a doctor! 🕹 CHOICES MATTER! 👻
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🎶”Love Don’t Die” by The Fray🎼
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#wastedroses #episode #episodeinteractive #visualnovel #medicine #novel #episodechooseyourstory #noticemeepisode #episodechooseyourstoryapp #episodeapp #episodelife #mascarosette #mascarette #drippingmascara
336 likes · 85 comments · 10 May 2019
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